Mid-Life Crisis: Helpline!

Players are divided into counselors and a caller, and the caller changes every round. As a counselor, race to to piece together advice from the words scattered in front of you in a humorous attempt to solve the caller's problem. The caller picks their favorite response. For 3-4 players, the first player to be awarded five cards wins. For more than five players, the first player to be awarded three cards wins.